El hombre

• Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills people.

• There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.

• Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

• The leading causes of death are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer

• When Chuck Norris jumps on water, he doesn't get wet.. water gets Chuck Norred.

• Oxygen needs Chuck Norris to survive.

• Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

• There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.

• Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

• Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

• Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

• It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

• Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

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• Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.